Taxi John?

Homelessness for Stupid People

The foibles of the most pampered homeless population in the Bay Area...

A friend of mine, I'll call her Miss C, came up to me this morning and told me of something she saw last night which had her flaming angry. She told me the story and I stood there wide eyed not knowing what to say...

“You want me to write about this?” I asked.

“Of course!” Miss C told me. “Why not?”

I had to admit, I was completely enthralled with her little tale, and I would have written of it. But there really is nothing like a first hand account. And so, I had her write about it and this is what she sent me:

I was finally warm, my tummy was full and my eyelids were getting very, very droopy. It was time to go retrieve my "woobie". For those who know me, my "woobie" has become quite the talking point! And, yes, I do get a lot of kidding about it - it's a huge, furry 15LB leopard blanket - just one of those comfort things that reminds me of home.

So, out I went to get the darn thing and in pulled a van.

Hmmm who is this? Well, what do you know, a Persian or Arab gentleman was driving and tried to explain to me that he was a taxi driver and dropping of a woman. It just didn't seem right. No markings on the otherwise normal looking van, no phone numbers, and the kicker was she wasn't being asked to pay a fare. Too boot, she got out barefoot! In this weather - please! You've got to be kidding me!! What a trick - no really!

The joke was on me - this was no normal taxi ride - it was a "John" letting out his "Trick" What the hell?? No way! No smelly ho's, no johns - just no! As many have read previously, there have been a few "issues" at the warming center and we are all on our very, very best behavior. In fact, a couple ladies have taken it upon themselves to provide "security" at center -one of them being me.

One lady takes the early evening hours and I take over at night due to my chronic insomnia! So far it's working well. We've busted a few for smoking out front and another for going in and out in the back to smoke during the quiet hours between 10PM and 6AM! Slamming doors and the arctic breeze that follows is unacceptable.

The best part of this is that the volunteers back us up - no questions asked.

So, when Tricky entered the building I was right behind her and notified staff what was going on. Tricky was promptly told she wasn't staying, but would be shod (she was barefoot) and fed and would need to make other arrangements for somewhere to sleep. Good enough!

I never thought I would need to say this but JUST A SHOUT OUT TO THE JOHNS IN THE TRI-VALLEY - DO NOT DROP YOUR STINKIN' HOS AND TRICKS OFF AT THE LIVERMORE HOMELESS REFUGE! LEAVE THEM WHERE YOU FOUND THEM!! AND IF YOU CAN AFFORD TO DO THEM, THEN PAY THEM A LIL BIT MORE TO GET A ROOM AND A SHOWER!